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The Roommate From Hell

This song is by MC Lars and appears on the album The Graduate (2006).

(Feat. MC Chris)

(Intro, MC Nate)
Hey, Welcome to Mirales orientation
My name's Nate and I'll be your RA for this year
Today we'll be moving into our dorms and building community
So go get your keys from the main office,
Come back, and get ready to meet your roommates
All right?
(All right all right all right)

He was the roommate from hell
He was the roommate from hell

(Verse 1, MC Lars)
Satan was my roommate, so junior year was hell
He lacked social skills and had a pungent smell
When your roommate is the devil it can be extremely wack
Putting posters on the wall of Trapt and Nickelback
Until the break of dawn he'd be mutilating sheep
It's 4 A.M. Satan, can you please go to sleep?
I can't have girls over when the dorm smells like Sterno
When did room 56 become Dante's Inferno?
He likes death and destruction, I like radio and art
He likes holding down Christians, and reading Jean Paul Sartre
While I'm going class studying my notes
He's eating baby fetuses and sacrificing goats
He tricks the freshmen girls into eating apples
Holding black masses down at the campus chapel
Should have never moved in (but no) wish I were dead
Should of found a place off campus on Craig's List instead

He was the roommate from hell
His name was Lucifier
Someone call a priest
And bring the crucifer
He was the roommate from hell
Leaves his pitchfork in my bed
I'm in a satanic panic
'Cause he is messing with my head

[Chris] (pass that giant balloon of helium over here yo)
[Lars] (okay, but wait... Satan, that's too much!)

(Verse 2, MC chris)
Boy you need a bitch slap, not my fault we're mismatched
You geek out over Beakman's World, I dig on World of Witchcraft
You thinkin' that I'm riff-raff, huffin' on a dishrag
I am just a player, play Slayer then I kick back
I know I reek of sulfer, leave the shower curtain open
I come home drunk, make crank calls to Queens and then Hoboken
But college is like Salem, all these bitches be so smokin'
If you're thinkin' that I'm leavin' then I'm thinkin' that you're jokin'
I gotta share my bunk with this post-punk chump
Calls this place a dump, says you've been through all my stuff
"I wish you'd go to hell", I say "Hey, that's where I'm from"
Blasts Death Cab and Devo, he's too emo to get crunk
I was a very nice boss down in Paradise Lost
I have very nice bling 'cause my minions mind floss
Colleges is knowledge at a very high cost
Gotta go do some blow with that ho Kate Moss

(Outro, MC chris)
Lars you're causing laughter
When you call yourself a rapper dude
How many Dead Milkmen albums are there named after you?
I always got beer, I always got weed
Best roommate ever if you ever asked me

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