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The Princess Who Saved Herself

This song is by Jonathan Coulton.

There was a castle by a waterfall
With a pink and purple wall
And a princess living there
She had no parents and was all alone
But she got by on her own
And she liked it pretty well

'Cause she never wore socks
She had a pet snake
She bought a red guitar
And she ate a whole cake
And there wasn't anybody there to tell her what to do
So she did what she wanted to
Everybody knew the story of the princess who saved herself
(The princess who saved herself, the princess who saved herself)

There was a dragon with a pointy tail
He was bigger than a whale
And his breath was terrible
He scared the princess when he came around
Tried to burn the castle down
But she caught him by his tail

Then she tied him to tree
So the dragon couldn't fly
She told him he was mean
And it made the dragon cry
When he finally apologised she offered him some tea
He accepted it graciously
Now he visits every weekend with the princess who saved herself
(The princess who saved herself, the princess who saved herself)

(Hello?)
(Hey, beautiful. Prince Phillip!)
(Oh. Hi, Phillip...)
(Yeah, we met at the Ball? I was the handsome one? I was wearing--)
(Hey, Phillip, tell me if this sounds like a phone hanging up?)
(Ha, yeah! It totally does! Hello? ...oh, I see.)

(Here we go...)
(Hello?)
(Fee Fi Fo Fum! I smell the-- Oh, come on!)

There was a witch who was an evil queen
She was wrinkled old and green
And she hated everyone
She saw the princess in her silver gown
Put the poison apple down
Asked her where she bought her clothes

So they got the witch a dress
Put some make-up on her face
They started up a band
And the dragon played the bass
Every Saturday they play until their fingertips are sore
Mostly math rock and cuddlecore
And they call themselves the Kingdom of the Princess Who Saved Herself
(The princess who saved herself, the princess who saved herself)
The princess who saved herself
(The princess who saved herself, the princess who saved herself)

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